Age - Tweens, Age - Teens, Tech and Parenting
Dana Hirt
Mentoring -- not Monitoring -- Best Approach ...

Raising digital natives requires parents to mentor their children on their journey to becoming good and safe digital citizens. Get my top resource recommendations and consider questions designed to help you develop an approach that reflects your values and intention.

Mentoring -- not Monitoring -- Best Approach for Parenting Digital Natives
Age - Teens, Age - Toddlers, Age - Tweens, back-to-school, Intentional Parenting, resilience, Teaching Resilience
Dana Hirt
Three 'Must-Dos' To Help Kids Cope With Violent ...

Here’s one thing you can rely on: Your kids will be exposed to an uncontrollable media assault on multiple platforms, as well as information – and misinformation – from friends and schoolmates.

As concerned and hungry for information as we, ourselves, may be, our job as parents in the face of this type of crisis is threefold:

·      Control your kids’ environment

·      Share only age-appropriate information

·      Don’t answer questions they haven’t asked

Three 'Must-Dos' To Help Kids Cope With Violent Events
Intentional Parenting, Tech and Parenting
Dana Hirt
4 Keys to Intentional Millennial Parenting

An intentional millenial parent is an empowered one. The four keys to becoming an empowered parent can be found here.

4 Keys to Intentional Millennial Parenting
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Social Media: How Much is TOO Much?

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Social Media: How Much is TOO Much?

Virtually every parent in my practice (and my personal life) asks this same question: “How concerned should I be about my kids’ use of screens and social media?” 

Parental concerns are shared by the Surgeon General of the United States, Dr. Vivek Murthy, who last year made his perspective public. In the advisory entitled, “Social Media and Youth Mental Health,” Dr. Murthy notes:

  “There is growing evidence that social media use is associated with harm to young people’s mental health….And for too many children, social media use is compromising their sleep and valuable in-person time with family and friends.

“We are in the middle of a national youth mental health crisis and I am concerned that social media is an important driver of that crisis – one we must urgently address.”

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Parenting and Politics

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Parenting and Politics

Our society is seemingly struggling to accept the dialectic, which I am defining broadly as the ability to tolerate the truth of contradictory information. More simply put, two things can be true at the same time. In dialectical thinking, we can recognize and accept opposite ideas and reconcile them as both being true, rather than reject that which does not align with our thinking. Our political environment is a stark example of how binary thinking, this OR that, has created massive polarization and manifested in lack of civility of discourse.

I am not pretending to be able to influence the growing paradigm of the angry binary, rather, I want my clients to have the language to confront this in their own homes, with their own children. Ultimately, I am motivated to help parents feel empowered and more confident and I want them to have meaningful relationship with their children for life.

 So, how does all of this translate to talking to your kids about politics and why does it matter?

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Kids’ Needs Supersede Parents’ During and After Divorce

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Kids’ Needs Supersede Parents’ During and After Divorce

The magnitude of the impact of divorce on children is well documented.  Not only do kids often believe (and internalize) that they are the reason their parents are divorcing, but they also worry that if parents can stop loving each other…then mommy and daddy might stop loving them too.

Try to imagine the emotional minefield kids must navigate, given they have zero control and even less emotional resources and reasoning skills. Uncertainty and even fear can be present for kids – especially during the first year or so as everyone adjusts to the new family reality.

That’s precisely why divorcing parents need to agree to prioritize the needs and best interests of the children. As divorcing parents, we need to be constantly aware of how our decisions will affect our children. While it’s impossible to shield children entirely from the impact, it is possible to minimize it by avoiding certain pitfalls and following good parenting practices.

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Communication is Key to Sharing the Parenting Load

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Communication is Key to Sharing the Parenting Load

As I shared in last month’s post, there probably is not enough overt discussion between parents about how to divvy up the voluminous responsibilities of parenting and maintaining a household. Even if the everyday jobs of cooking, cleaning, carpooling and child-care are equally shared (or outsourced), parenting requires a huge amount of thinking, planning and strategizing that’s well-supported by research evidence.

No parent configuration is immune.  Disparity can occur whether you’re in a hetero, same-sex or other family configuration. The answer to finding equilibrium – like most problems between parents – is communication. 

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Sharing the Mental Load/Being a Co-CEO at Home

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Sharing the Mental Load/Being a Co-CEO at Home

An imbalance in the “mental” aspect of parenting is where I see the most discrepancy – and sometimes it’s what lies underneath a couple’s presenting issue when they first start working with me.  Because even if both parents share equally in the execution of the tasks – or if they have the funds to outsource the cleaning, cooking, carpooling and childcare– one partner still does much of the heavy lifting that remains.

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The Value of Reflection: Your Year-End Parenting Inventory

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The Value of Reflection: Your Year-End Parenting Inventory

At this time of year, I suspect your to-do list is more overflowing than ever. I get it. Mine is too. Actually, it was.

In a recent Instagram post, I shared my decision that this holiday season I would focus on the people and activities that have meaning and moment and are aligned with my values. Not surprisingly, these types of things seldom have anything to do with list-making or gift-buying.

In that spirit, I’m inviting you to prioritize what matters most to many parents: family. It’s a 3-step inventory for people who parent together – in every family configuration. The inventory is designed to help take stock of your personal parenting experience, assess wins and challenges in 2023, and determine the areas in which you want to put your energies and efforts during the coming year.

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Gratitude Offers Hope for Parenting through Tough Times

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Gratitude Offers Hope for Parenting through Tough Times

When kids are little, parents get to witness up close their tremendous capacity for learning and growth and delight. Our joy often arises spontaneously, and we feel overwhelmed with gratitude for the gift of parenting those amazing little beings.

As children grow and face normal developmental challenges, parenting can feel rocky as we watch our kids react with frustration or anxiety at milestones not yet mastered. But as long as we stay tethered to our values and use them to guide our decision-making, we can find reasons to be grateful during these times, too, particularly when we see evidence of our kids meeting their difficulties with resolve and determination.

No question, it’s easy to feel grateful when life is good and parenting feels manageable.

But what about those times when, as parents, we’re challenged to navigate an extremely difficult time in a child’s life? It’s one thing to feel grateful when a rocky time is in the rearview mirror. But how can we possibly feel gratitude when we’re in the middle of the maelstrom?

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Redefining Co-Parenting to Include Married Couples!

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Redefining Co-Parenting to Include Married Couples!

No two people parent the same way and no couple is immune to challenges in co-parenting their child/children. We all bring our personal experience of being parented to the job and we have different priorities, values, cultural experiences, etc. Yet, we need to learn ways to communicate, share authentically and compromise in order to co-parent effectively. This is even more true when navigating separation and/or divorce, but it is relevant in every family. Being married does not mean that the two of you share one approach to raising children. Learning better communication skills insures healthier collaboration, greater support and affirmation AND increases the odds of positive outcomes.